It's hard to be gr8

Especially when it's effortless. Sometimes I wake up and look out of my cave, at the crashing waves and the local fishermen battling each other with their angry nipples, and I think, "Oh my, why can't I have a normal-person-bad-day for once? I'm sick of my slaves bringing me everything and feeding me with the aeroplane spoon. All I want to do is play catch really badly with the other man-snail children."